Recovering from postpartum depression has lead to somethings falling behind — laundry? — but it meant I wanted to really pour myself into Halloween.

It’s taken over seven months, heaps of medication and an intensive outpatient therapy — but, you guys! I love her! For months I wanted her gone, but my brain is back. I’m functioning. I have a little bit of disbelief and I worry somethings going to cloud my mind again and take me away from…

“You are really, really, not alone.” — My Blue Heaven This past weekend was full of zoom calls as I was accepted to be a fellow at Zoeglossia, a community of poets with disabilities. It’s hard enough to find poets in your everyday life, more so other disabled people, so this combination rocked my world.…

Yesterday I was too tired to do much with Elro. My sleep had been disturbed and I was feeling kinda crazy and overwhelmed. What I could do for her was draw her a bath, which she loves. So every time I drew her a bath I signed the word “bath.” Today I’m feeling great and…

I went to Balboa Park and was surprised at how much better I felt just walking around. The colors and creations took my mind off my intense worry and sadness. I wondered how I could add some of that color and creation into my daily life.

My brilliant mother-in-law brought cookies to frost. First you dip them into frosting, then sprinkles. I have postpartum depression so lately things have not felt pleasant and I have not felt present in day to day activities. This was different because it was crafty (always my ticket out of a bad mood) and someone else…

Last night I got three hours of sleep. Max. I don’t know what other people do when that happens to them, but I know for me it’s a really big deal. I tell my support network, I call my doctor and I come up with a plan on how I can actually get sleep tonight.…

The best part of having a garden is to see everything Elro is getting out of it. She loves carrots and strawberries because she gets them straight out of the earth. When she eats anything in the garden she says “nom nom nom” as she eats. I love having a garden available to her!  

When I’m sad and overwhelmed I take pictures of my garden.

My med change is working. No more anxiety attacks! The problem is I’m having trouble sleeping. This is what I take each night: 10 mgs zyprexa, 150 mgs trazadone, 50 mgs lamictal, 100 mgs of Benadryl, 9 mgs of melatonin. And I still can’t sleep! I didn’t get any writing done today. I was so…